So, you found a great amazing open ritual…. What’s your next thought? Well if you are a parent, especially a single parent, it is can I bring my children. Which the answer most of the time is either no this is either adults only or 16+ or even worse is the answer of if they can be quiet and well behaved. OK, raise of hands how many adults never mind kids can be quiet and well behaved in new situations. The problem here is, do you risk taking your child with you, even if your child is usually quiet and well behaved, and know this is the one time they won’t be and not only look like a crappy parent, but also that you don’t care about other participants. In the end what happens is many of us become isolated, many covens and coven rituals are at least teen and up. Most open rituals are the same. Pagans as a minority religion group need resources and networking to answer the tough questions such as what to tell your child when a friend at school tells them they are going to hell. As pagan parents we need opportunities to introduce our children to our religion and spiritual practice, we need community, and we need rituals ourselves.
So what is a pagan parent to do. Well we were very lucky we found a great organization the Society of Elder Faith’s who has a Pagan Family Connection that hosts kid friendly rituals and also found an amazing UU church that had a CUUPS group. We have attended all our local Pagan Prides and now are going to be vending at Southern NH Pagan Pride Day and Eastern MA Pagan Pride Day. Check out Witchvox for local family groups and great pagan articles. Check out the Magickal Child Books, Little Pagan Acorns, Pookapages for Kids, Rupert’s Tales, Pagan Children Learning Series, Circle Round by Starhawk, Family Wicca to name a few. Teach your children about nature, everyday magick, and being a general good person. Show them what Pagan means, answer questions honestly. Maybe reach out to other Pagan parents to either form your own circle or a babysitting co-op so you can take turns experiencing an adult ritual.
I get it as I think most Pagan parents do that rituals can be very serious work and some are not at all children friendly. But as a pagan parent I can tell you it can be quite lonely and feel that the pagan community is unfriendly towards children and families. Sometimes when we ask about children and rituals we feel like children are something to be tolerated. As a community if we want to continue to grow and thrive we have to welcome, love, and teach the next generation. I am so grateful for finding my Pagan Family and I hope you are able to find yours.
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